"To Live is Christ, To Die is Gain..."

Do you ever wonder what the meaning is of that phrase that Paul speaks? "To live is Christ, but to die is gain..."? I've never really thought about that phrase much, mostly I just ignored it because the implications of such a phrase are so large I didn't want to deal with it. But now that I've been coming to spots where my faith and actions really take root and define who I am I've found myself looking at these hard questions. How do you translate this to your life?

For one, society in general places so much emphasis on someones death, but in the same sentence can denounce it. Abortion is one thing where life doesn't even enter the argument, people just don't care about it. But when someone dies in life who is just another guy he'll at least get a mention in the paper. Movies depict death of notables in a huge dramatic way, where as the average soldier on the battlefield just gets cut down. Society is saturated with the idea of death just like we're saturated with sensuality. How do you deal with death when life itself holds very little meaning?

As a Christian life should be just as important if not even more than death. We always look at death as this painful and hurtful ending that will impact everyone around us negatively. Look at Paul, how important was he during the times he was in? How many people would be effected when he kicked it? But at the point that he was thinking about it he was almost regretting the fact that he was still alive! But at that point it wasn't out of depression, it was because he wanted to be close to God, he wanted the real thing.

I have never been that passionate about being close to God. I knew I could be close to God if I wanted to, but my heart being human was always about doing what I wanted as opposed to going with God. I looked at being close to God as spending countless hours in the Bible, praying for so long you forgot to eat, decided to fast for weeks anyway, and then come out to work just to keep the bills current. That didn't sound too fun to me. I don't think that that is what it means, but the visualization was enough to scare me for awhile.

Why live though? What is life for but to glorify God? The life we have for certain is a gift, it's not just a given that we have this life and that it is now our right to do whatever we feel like. We can, but it isn't our right. The point of our existence is to give glory to God, but because of our fallen nature we have the ability to chose not to live to His glory. Thus my question comes, what truly is life? Paul found a way to live between life and death seemingly. Basically he was alive because God wanted him to continue to minister, but for Paul, anytime a Roman soldier walked past he was thinking about how in half a second he could be with God.

"To live is Christ..." this part of the verse I just don't get at all. I know that in life we are supposed to emulate Christ and His sacrifice, but life is Christ? I just can't seem to get my mind around that. But the "to die is gain..." makes absolute sense to me. We think "the suffering is over," but those who understand the verse say, "I am with God."

What is the purpose of life? How do we deal with life and death? It seems to me that when you have a passion for God above all things all questions to that tune don't exist anymore. On the one hand you have the opportunity to bring glory to God, and on the other you have the opportunity to be with God. When your heart is at this place you'll have the same problem as Paul, I just wish I could be with you God, let the world go its own way, I just want to be with you.

"To live is Christ, to die is gain..." I still don't think I fully understand this...